We lived in Villiers Avenue, just
opposite the tennis club. I don’t really know if it’s still there but we
would often play when we had the chance. We spent more time in the ‘shrub’
though, a small area of cultivated trees backing on to what I suppose was a very
old tip of some sort. This area was magic to us and became the scene of many
heroic contests some of which lasted for days when the school holidays were
around. The battles were small scale because generally there were only three or
four of us but what we lacked in scale and numbers we made up for in imagination
and sheer bravery!
Even heroes
had to have some sustenance despite the pitiful conditions of war and so, every
now and then we’d succumb to the pangs of hunger and thirst and take our
pocket money to the local shops. Now at the bottom of Villiers Avenue was a
large square with a pub in the middle of it, aptly named the Villiers Arms, On
one other side was a parade of shops and I can remember a Co-op, a dress shop I
think and also a grocers’. This shop was grandly titled ‘A.E. Shale -
Grocer’ in gold letters on a brown background. I’d like to say that it was a
sort of ‘open all hours’ shop rather like the shop in the TV series of that
name, but it wasn’t. Shale’s kept regular hours including a lunch hour and a
half day closing on Thursday too, and that was a major stumbling block for a
hungry and thirsty battalion needing sustenance and liquid mid –way through a
battle to save the free world from the enemy hordes. (the propriety of current
times forbids from naming the enemies but I think you can probably guess!).
Shale’s was
not only a sub-post office but also sold just about everything else, so Mr Shale
got plenty of trade and to quote a well known phrase ‘he knew how to charge’
too! The post office was the clincher of course because “Shaley” as he was
known, distributed all the local old age pension and dole money hence the shop
must have been a little gold mine, that is to everyone except Mr Shale who,
according to his opinion had a hard and mostly unproductive life! To us,
Shale’s was always the second port of call for sweets after the off-licence
section of the pub. The pub was a place of secrecy and strange smells, of loud
language and forbidden habits and it also had a much better selection of sweets!
However there were some days when Shale’s just had to do because licensing
hours meant that the number one choice was closed!
Mr Shale was
middle-aged, short and wore glasses. He was always dressed in a shirt, tie and
his grocer trademark, a brown coat. He didn’t much like us kids but to see him
fawn over our mums’ when they were buying in the shop you’d have thought him
a paragon of customer service! My mum didn’t like Shale’s much and preferred
to use the co-op when she could because of course the Wolverhampton and District
Cooperative Society as it was then, gave everyone of its shoppers a dividend, or
‘divi’ for shopping. The divi was a small yellow ticket carefully completed
at the end of the purchase by the shop assistant and then handed to the
purchaser. You had to have a ‘divi’ number of course to identify you and to
this day I can still remember ours…34227! I never quite found out quite what
the dividend brought to us, but my mum was convinced that it was the reason she
shopped there.
As kids of
course the war games we played involved weapons of all types. A favourite was
the grenade, which was easily mimicked by a large stone or a half brick, We had
the actions expertly practised from the pulling of the pin with the teeth, to
the round arm throwing action for accuracy and the vocal explosion that always
achieved maximum damage on the enemy whoever they were on that occasion! There
were times when the ‘action’ strayed from the ‘shrub’ out on to the
road, and on one unfortunate occasion to the very perimeter of Shale’s shop.
It was Thursday afternoon, the shop was shut and unfortunately so was the pub
since we’d left our visit a little late. Everywhere was quiet and there
wasn’t a soul to be seen. We were making our hungry, disappointed way back to
the shrub when war broke out. One could never second-guess when an enemy attack
would happen and so when a sniper from Shale’s doorway singled one of our
party out it became a serious business. Dodging behind a nearby and very slim
lamppost we desperately sought for an effective reply to silence the menace.
Without even thinking, one of our party who shall remain nameless picked up a
large ‘grenade’ (stone), pulled out the pin with his teeth and hurled it
unerringly at the ‘sniper’.
Oh dear!
The brick flew
with reasonable accuracy towards the shop doorway, hit the ground and flew up,
straight into the huge plate glass shop window! I can still see it now in the
same slow motion I viewed it at the time. There was a huge ‘bang’, and the
window…….didn’t shatter! Quite why it did not shatter I’ll never know
but instead of the horror of a mountain of glass pieces there was a huge crack
across the bottom corner of the plate glass. You have never seen kids move so
fast pausing only to pick up the offending grenade and hurtle off back to
barracks.
What happened?
Shale never found out and probably thought it was someone with a grudge against
him. There were probably plenty of them! I have to say that whilst he never
accused us of the misdeed, he did give us some very strange looks. It was almost
as if he knew. As for the war games, the armistice after the events didn’t
last long but in the pitched battles that followed, I noticed that grenades were
not the popular weapon choice that they had been!